Blackouts

The novel revolves around the life of the Narrator, a man in his late twenties, who has experienced multiple stays in mental asylums. He is a biracial individual with a Puerto Rican American father who worked as a cop and a White Catholic mother who discouraged him from learning Spanish. The Narrator frequently has flashbacks to his troubled childhood, marked by a distant, glamorous, macho undercover cop father and an emotionally and physically abused mother. His life takes a complicated turn when he begins experiencing seizures that lead to dissociative fugue states, causing him to be institutionalized as a teenager.

During his time in the mental institution, he befriends Juan, an older man who has spent a significant portion of his life in and out of the same hospital. The precise nature of Juan’s condition remains unspecified, but it is possibly severe manic depression. Juan and the Narrator bond over their shared experiences as gay Hispanic men. When the Narrator is transferred after an accident, he discovers a gold cross in his bag, a memento from Juan. He begins wearing it as a symbol of their connection.

The story follows the Narrator as he leaves New York and travels west to a small city in the American Southwest. He ends up in a run-down desert hospital called The Palace, which primarily caters to terminal patients. Among these patients is Juan, whom the Narrator sneaks into visit every night after engaging in prostitution in town.